RISKING EMBARRASSMENT

While never wishing to offend, I increasingly find, nowadays, that in order to maintain courage in my ability to retain mental independence, discretion has to occasionally be sacrificed. Risks are now more frequently taken in relation to verbal communication with others. This, I think, is possibly due to the combination of both trying to continue to demonstrate that one still has the ability to maintain independent logical thought processes and also meeting the need to demonstrate to others that one still has a degree of ability, wit, knowledge and wisdom, to hold ones own, if sometimes only briefly, in discussion. To satisfy the need to prove to oneself and others, that one is not yet "yesterday's man", is vital. To make one's point, or explain oneself, or to fully comprehend what another is saying, it is sometimes necessary to insist on frequently recapping what has been said. This may prove to be annoying / frustrating, even confusing, for the other party, particularly if they do not know you. However, the risk of upsetting them or even causing embarrasment, I consider is one worth taking.

JSAFGA

SENIOR MOMENTS

Yesterday was one of more "senior moments" than usual. Being Palm Sunday the early morning walk with Blossom (my dog) over the meadows commenced at 9am with a view to being back home by 10.30am to walk up the road to the village church for the 11am Palm Sunday service. However, where or how I know not, but the time flew by, somehow unnoticed. Relaxing and thoughts scudding by like the clouds as we went from field to field. Hare and pheasant being sprung by Bloss and I enjoying the sporting chases. No blood shed and everyone creature excercised and stimulated by the occassion. It wasnt till arriving back home at 11.30am that I realised some time had passed unaccounted for. Still it was a most enjoyable walk and I was able eventually to catch up with the palm and donkey procession around the village in time for the final reading and hymn, followed by the soup and cheese in the village hall.

These moments in time come and go, some we remember some we dont - be not concerned - all is well.
JSAFGA

RIDING THE WAVES

It might be considered by some, that way to deal with the daily issues associated with dementia, would be to strive to fight for the lost moments of memory or thought. This maybe a satisfactory approach for some. However, my experience to date, I say to date because it is the only day with which we have to deal. is While making sure that each day has some moments of significant action, be that physical and / or mental stimulation, I do not find it helpful or consider it wise, to start struggling with temporary lapses of memory or mood.

In the periods, like those referred to above, I find it best to ride the wave, of whatever the circumstance might be. Like all waves, they usually start small with a gradually increasing swell, then before long, break and dissipate. They can either be allowed to swamp the craft, or alternatively, if it is steered in a skillful manner, the wave will carry boat forward safely.

One is the skipper of ones own craft and the journey can be a good,  provided one uses the rough water to carry you forward rather drown you.

JSAFGA      

SPRING BRINGS NEW OPPORTUNITIES

The arrival of Spring brings new opportunities for a fresh approach to life, as well as to living. For those of us who are lucky to be fit enough to be able to enjoy the first few weeks of the new season, we can enjoy the removal of the dead Winter growth revealing new plant life. The daffodils formed flowers getting ready to open, as are the buds on many bushes and trees. All that is required now is a small amount of warm sunshine. The new growth bursting forth, may also raise our spirits. We can look forward to the commencement of the eagerly awaited colourful show. We can shake off the gloom of Winter and make another new start. A change in activities can also help give one a new outlook on life in general. A change in outlook, whatever one's state, may help one better cope with one's situation and enhance one's ability to maximise their potential to enjoy the many differing opportunities life has to offer. 

JSAFGA

RAISING OTHER'S SPIRITS CAN HELP MAINTAIN YOUR OWN

Some days are better than others, sometimes our spirit's are uplifted for a variety a of reasons. Sometimes only a relatively small occurrence can set us back. To occasionally focus on our own particular situation can be healthy, as part of a reality check. However, I find it helpful not to linger too long, on the variety of relatively minor enforced amendments to life, as a result of one's condition. As with everyone too much introspection can distract from the opportunities one still has to brighten one's own and other's days and to help lighten their burden. Our carer is the one most deserving of this support.

To be seen to be having a positive approach to life, can be uplifting to others, as well as oneself and can be a positive boost to the one shouldering the main responsibility for our care. With the resulting positivity, high spirits and the associated tendency, nowadays, for the mouth to engage before the brain, my approach is to go with the flow. Although sometimes this may result in slight alienation or cause raised eyebrows among a few, on balance, the benefits to both oneself and one's loved one, outweighs any resulting negativity from others.

To try and stay positive, is the least one can do for both ourselves and those who care for us. When the occasion arises that the negative aspects come into focus, we are better equipped to minimise their impact. We can then continue journeying on our  "good life with dementia".

JSAFGA

VALLEYS AND HILLSIDES

This morning when walking with the dog, viewing the surrounding hills and valleys, the thoughts that enjoined me were that, from on high and looking down over it all, it resembled many a person's life path. The compartmentalised fields divided by the limestone walls, the deep valleys, the deserted and dilapidated stone barns which once gave shelter and warmth to both cattle, sheep and farmer, many now near collapsed, due to years of neglect and the ravages of the weather. These places hold countless memories for and of, many people over centuries. Those people were real, as were the livestock they looked after. Not only the people who worked the land, but also the many thousands of walkers and visitors who have visited the area.

The patch quilted scenery, like life, contains many seasonal changing aspects and yet also the steadfastness of the main physical features. The river, whose waters disappear into the underground limestone caverns during the summer and then reappear during the autumn  rains and winter's snow. To be able contemplate these things is a wondrous aspect of this life journey. To be able to peacefully reflect on such things brings a great joy. This far exceeds the benefits of being able to remember every happening of the day or everything that has to be done. The frustrations and annoyance, due to lack of understanding, confusions and memory loss, verbal fluency etc, fade into insignificance as silent witness of the depth and beauty of lives past and present and creation are contemplated, helps to make journeying this way a "Good Life With Dementia"!

JSAFGA.

MISSING LINKS

I feel disposed to write about "Missing Links" as this can be an occupational hazard / challenge on the road of the "Good Life". Missing links can be frustrating for everyone in all walks of life and at all stages of life. They often eventually reveal themselves sooner or later. Even when they don't, their relevance has usually passed, as has their significance.

Now, what are the sort of links that go missing? They can be many and varied, sometimes words, sometimes ideas, sometimes thought processes, sometimes emotions, sometimes relating to memories. The fact that the link goes missing, whether temporarily or long term, can cause a moment or two or even longer, of disruption / consternation. However, it is important to try and adapt as quickly as possible to the new situation, without the unrecalled, yet real, link that is missing.

Sometimes, although a thought process is interrupted, due to a missing link, it is possible that this may be advantageous, provided that the frustration associated with it can be quickly overcome. The potential advantage, is that the brain has to devise another strategy for dealing with this new found situation. It helps, if one can get oneself into a long-term positive mindset. This then ensures that every set back, while being acknowledged as such, is still seen as an opportunity, to draw on the hidden resources that the brain and ones personality can muster. This positive attitude, if able to be adopted, will help to overcome the disadvantage of no longer having the "Missing Links".

JSAFGA